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pantymime:

if there’s anything I can’t handle right now it’s this

pantymime:

if there’s anything I can’t handle right now it’s this

(via guimauvelapin)

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stopiero:

I will suck dick to get the Sims 4

(via booknerd93)

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malformalady:

McDonald’s has been forced to open its first ever restaurant with a turquoise coloured sign after city planners said the signature yellow sign would be too garish. Officials in Sedona, Arizona told the fast-food giant they were unable to open a restaurant with the trademark yellow logo.This is due to the city’s strict regulations which prevent buildings from ruining the picturesque view of the desert.
Photo credit: Michael Wright/WENN.com

malformalady:

McDonald’s has been forced to open its first ever restaurant with a turquoise coloured sign after city planners said the signature yellow sign would be too garish. Officials in Sedona, Arizona told the fast-food giant they were unable to open a restaurant with the trademark yellow logo.This is due to the city’s strict regulations which prevent buildings from ruining the picturesque view of the desert.

Photo credit: Michael Wright/WENN.com

(via booknerd93)

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bonerdoctor:

sex criminals 007

(via booknerd93)

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mickeypretzels:

My boyfriend is the best because he surprised me with this perfect Scrump doll that he had made special for me.

mickeypretzels:

My boyfriend is the best because he surprised me with this perfect Scrump doll that he had made special for me.

(via booknerd93)

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EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO REBLOGS THIS WILL GET THE FOLLOWING IN THEIR INBOX.

  • A BRIEF ORIGIN STORY
  • A SUPERPOWER OR THREE, MAYBE FOUR DEPENDING
  • A SUPERHERO OR VILLAIN NAME
  • YOU MIGHT ALSO GET AN ARCHNEMESIS WHO HAS REBLOGGED THIS ALREADY

AND YES I MEAN EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO REBLOGS THIS. UNTIL, SAY, AUGUST 2015. A FULL YEAR. LONG ENOUGH, RIGHT?

LET’S DO THIS THING.

(Source: mindofcristian1999, via sassafrasjungle)

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(Source: geekyasfuck, via thefrogman)

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panic/anxiety attack

deanisoutofpie:

pushed-too-far:

chris-sid:

jaspinder:

  • breath in for 4 seconds
  • hold your breath for 7 seconds
  • exhale breath for 8 seconds

repeat once or twice more.

This causes an autonomic nervous system shift from a sympathetic (fight or flight reaction) state to a parasympathetic response.

Use this for panic/anxiety attacks, exams, presentations.

Never not reblog

Tumblr got anxiety advice. Fuck yeah.

behr-babe

(via madmanmoriarty)

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sargasmic-humor:

when you catch someone checking out your bae so you gotta mark your territory real quick like

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(via madmanmoriarty)

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can’t wait till all my friends get married and have nice weddings with open bars

(via knights-of-gallifrey)

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onlyblackgirl:

proteinpills:

shanellbklyn:

midnight-sun-rising:

trebled-negrita-princess:

babiegyrle:

losrachetss:

kingmuthaphuckinbasquiat:

thaunderground:

sizvideos:

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I’ve never used the word “exasperating” in my vocab ever.

Lmaoooo he said “buy me some earplugs too”

He is too grown lmao 😂😂

Lololol this was hilarious

And he used it CORRECTLY

😂😂😂 lil man is NOT excited 😂😂

OMG I’m crying he said what kind of baby is it and gave the strong ass point he so serious right now he is not having any of his mothers shit!

Lmao get him some earplugs. He’s so shady

Can we talk about the lil girl tho. Her expression didn’t change once.

(via madmanmoriarty)

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egobus:

omg my little brother was using my computer and look at his search history

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so embarrassing

(via madmanmoriarty)

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prokopetz:

This is the one time of year that I love wasps.
Not because the wasps themselves get any nicer. They’re horrid little creatures year round. No, it’s because I have a couple of big apple trees out back, and late August, early September is when the apples start ripening.
Now, if you don’t harvest your own fruit, there are two things you need to know about apples.
The first thing you need to know about apples is that, when apples get ripe, they tend to fall from the tree at the slightest breeze.
I often work late at the office; by the time I get home, there are piles of apples scattered everywhere - and sure enough, the wasps are out in force, gorging themselves on the fruit. When I go to clean up the windfallen apples, the wasps naturally do the “rawr, I’ma fuck you up!” routine for which wasps are known.
The second thing you need to know about apples is that they ferment very rapidly in the late August heat.
So: the wasps try to come at me, but they’re too drunk to fly. They get about an inch off the ground, then faceplant directly into the turf, flip over onto their backs, and lay there, legs twitching in the air as they try in vain to find something to sting.
Perhaps I’m a man of simple pleasures, but I bust up laughing every. single. time.
Fucking wasps.

prokopetz:

This is the one time of year that I love wasps.

Not because the wasps themselves get any nicer. They’re horrid little creatures year round. No, it’s because I have a couple of big apple trees out back, and late August, early September is when the apples start ripening.

Now, if you don’t harvest your own fruit, there are two things you need to know about apples.

The first thing you need to know about apples is that, when apples get ripe, they tend to fall from the tree at the slightest breeze.

I often work late at the office; by the time I get home, there are piles of apples scattered everywhere - and sure enough, the wasps are out in force, gorging themselves on the fruit. When I go to clean up the windfallen apples, the wasps naturally do the “rawr, I’ma fuck you up!” routine for which wasps are known.

The second thing you need to know about apples is that they ferment very rapidly in the late August heat.

So: the wasps try to come at me, but they’re too drunk to fly. They get about an inch off the ground, then faceplant directly into the turf, flip over onto their backs, and lay there, legs twitching in the air as they try in vain to find something to sting.

Perhaps I’m a man of simple pleasures, but I bust up laughing every. single. time.

Fucking wasps.

(via guimauvelapin)